To my Son... this is our pregnancy story
June 4, 2018
I'm 22 weeks and 4 days pregnant with you now, my son.
When I first learned that God blessed me with your existence, I couldn't believe it. How is it possible that just when I have given up the thought of ever having my own child, God gave me you? That's the time when I knew that miracles really do happen.
I can still remember the time when I took my pregnancy test. It was a Saturday morning. I bought 3 pregnancy tests from different brands. I want to make sure that I got everything covered. hahaha! Your daddy told me to just take the test just because I have been feeling pretty irritable. You know, my son, I'm glad that your dad was at least mature enough to tell me to do that. I had to ask him what will happen if ever it would be positive. He then said that you would be loved and cherished.
Therefore, I decided to do so!
I was even texting your Tita Mimi about what could happen if I found out that I am pregnant. She said that she would be happy for me. So, there's no turning back! I did the test the next day. I was still sleepy at that time. I just wasn't really expecting anything at all. I guess that I have always thought that I am barren. Never did I thought that I would ever see the 2 lines appear right in front of my eyes. When I saw the result, I was like "Oh, okay. It's positive. I'm pregnant."
It just hasn't sunk in yet...
I'm 22 weeks and 4 days pregnant with you now, my son.
When I first learned that God blessed me with your existence, I couldn't believe it. How is it possible that just when I have given up the thought of ever having my own child, God gave me you? That's the time when I knew that miracles really do happen.
I can still remember the time when I took my pregnancy test. It was a Saturday morning. I bought 3 pregnancy tests from different brands. I want to make sure that I got everything covered. hahaha! Your daddy told me to just take the test just because I have been feeling pretty irritable. You know, my son, I'm glad that your dad was at least mature enough to tell me to do that. I had to ask him what will happen if ever it would be positive. He then said that you would be loved and cherished.
Therefore, I decided to do so!
I was even texting your Tita Mimi about what could happen if I found out that I am pregnant. She said that she would be happy for me. So, there's no turning back! I did the test the next day. I was still sleepy at that time. I just wasn't really expecting anything at all. I guess that I have always thought that I am barren. Never did I thought that I would ever see the 2 lines appear right in front of my eyes. When I saw the result, I was like "Oh, okay. It's positive. I'm pregnant."
It hasn't sunk in that my life would change for the better...
It hasn't sunk in that my life is not mine any longer...
It hasn't sunk in that my life will not be the same like before...
It just hasn't sunk in yet...
I immediately texted your Tita Mimi. I had to just share the news. I guess I woke her up with a big news. She said that she cried because she's so happy for me. How nice is that? You were welcomed the first time that I shared the news. I'm just so glad that Tita Mimi is one of the firsts to know about you because she was genuinely happy for us.
I don't really know what I will do yet the time when I found out that I am pregnant. The only thing that I know is that I will be keeping you. There's no way that I would want to lose you. You were the child that I have wanted for a long time. I know that I should have told your Daddy about you as soon as I found out. I guess I just wanted more time to digest everything. I was thinking of how I am going to tell your grandparents about you. How am I going to continue working? How about my plans to work abroad?
Funny how things just enter your mind when you are at a turning point in your life. You think about all things... whether they are essential or not. Everything is just all jumbled up in your brain. So, if ever you find yourself in this situation, you just need to answer a simple question. "Do I really, seriously want this?"
If the answer is YES, then fight for it. You know that you want it because you believe in the importance of that something. Don't let go.
If the answer is NO, then just forget about it. Don't look back. We can't do anything about the what ifs anymore. It's just a waste of time.
Anyway, moving on... I just have to take things one day at a time. The realization hasn't sunk in until I was in the clinic with my first OB-Gyne. I told her that I took a pregnancy test and that it was positive. She uttered a simple congratulations. I asked her if it's really sure. Is there a possibility that those pregnancy tests could have a defect? Hahaha! Mama is so silly,right? She said that there's no way that it could be wrong. When she said that, that's when I realize that I am really pregnant. She asked me to do several tests & also an ultrasound to confirm how far along am I.
Imagine my surprise when I found out that I was already almost 3 months pregnant with you. I didn't even know it! I went into shock! There was already a small living person inside me and I didn't even know. I remember walking from the hospital into the office in a trance. It was such a wake-up call. That was the time when I realized that life is really gonna be different.
Since I'm not the type who usually tells everybody around me what is happening so I tried to keep it hush hush. Just a few dear friends know your existence. I'm so glad that Tita Mimi is always there for us, supporting us all the time. I really wouldn't have lasted without her. I wish that you could find great friends like her, my son.
By this time, your daddy already knows all about you. I told him when I was on the train. He looked shocked. I think in his case, the reality of it all has sunk in faster than it did for me. Honestly, I was thinking that he may not acknowledge you because we were still in the early stages of dating. I have to give it to your dad for manning up and taking responsibility.
I hope that you will inherit that,my son. There will come a time when you need to step up and be responsible for something that you did. Don't be afraid. God will be there for you. He won't give you something that you can't handle. Remember, the more a diamond is cut, the more it sparkles.
As of now, everything is somehow okay.
You kick so hard when I'm happy or when I ate something that you like such as chocolate cakes or egussi! You also kick a lot whenever you hear your daddy's voice. We are not living together yet so I guess that is why you just feel so overjoyed when you hear his voice since you don't hear him very often. Thankfully, there are a lot of people who support us too.
Your lolo and lola, first and foremost, on which she said she doesn't wanna be called lola. Maybe you can just call her Nana and Tata for lolo.
My friends, who are all your immediate aunts, like your Tita Mimi, Ninang Alona, Tita Mads, Tita Arbheen, Tita Kelly and others.
There are so many people who care for us that I can't even enumerate all of them. We are so lucky indeed,baby!
I hope that you will be a happy and healthy person.
That is what Mommy wishes for you.
I love you, my son!
It hasn't sunk in that my life is not mine any longer...
It hasn't sunk in that my life will not be the same like before...
It just hasn't sunk in yet...
I immediately texted your Tita Mimi. I had to just share the news. I guess I woke her up with a big news. She said that she cried because she's so happy for me. How nice is that? You were welcomed the first time that I shared the news. I'm just so glad that Tita Mimi is one of the firsts to know about you because she was genuinely happy for us.
I don't really know what I will do yet the time when I found out that I am pregnant. The only thing that I know is that I will be keeping you. There's no way that I would want to lose you. You were the child that I have wanted for a long time. I know that I should have told your Daddy about you as soon as I found out. I guess I just wanted more time to digest everything. I was thinking of how I am going to tell your grandparents about you. How am I going to continue working? How about my plans to work abroad?
Funny how things just enter your mind when you are at a turning point in your life. You think about all things... whether they are essential or not. Everything is just all jumbled up in your brain. So, if ever you find yourself in this situation, you just need to answer a simple question. "Do I really, seriously want this?"
If the answer is YES, then fight for it. You know that you want it because you believe in the importance of that something. Don't let go.
If the answer is NO, then just forget about it. Don't look back. We can't do anything about the what ifs anymore. It's just a waste of time.
Anyway, moving on... I just have to take things one day at a time. The realization hasn't sunk in until I was in the clinic with my first OB-Gyne. I told her that I took a pregnancy test and that it was positive. She uttered a simple congratulations. I asked her if it's really sure. Is there a possibility that those pregnancy tests could have a defect? Hahaha! Mama is so silly,right? She said that there's no way that it could be wrong. When she said that, that's when I realize that I am really pregnant. She asked me to do several tests & also an ultrasound to confirm how far along am I.
 |
| Look at how tiny you were at 11 weeks! This is your first picture! |
Since I'm not the type who usually tells everybody around me what is happening so I tried to keep it hush hush. Just a few dear friends know your existence. I'm so glad that Tita Mimi is always there for us, supporting us all the time. I really wouldn't have lasted without her. I wish that you could find great friends like her, my son.
By this time, your daddy already knows all about you. I told him when I was on the train. He looked shocked. I think in his case, the reality of it all has sunk in faster than it did for me. Honestly, I was thinking that he may not acknowledge you because we were still in the early stages of dating. I have to give it to your dad for manning up and taking responsibility.
 |
| Your tiny hand is waving hello as we had our 12-week ultrasound! |
I hope that you will inherit that,my son. There will come a time when you need to step up and be responsible for something that you did. Don't be afraid. God will be there for you. He won't give you something that you can't handle. Remember, the more a diamond is cut, the more it sparkles.
As of now, everything is somehow okay.
You kick so hard when I'm happy or when I ate something that you like such as chocolate cakes or egussi! You also kick a lot whenever you hear your daddy's voice. We are not living together yet so I guess that is why you just feel so overjoyed when you hear his voice since you don't hear him very often. Thankfully, there are a lot of people who support us too.
Your lolo and lola, first and foremost, on which she said she doesn't wanna be called lola. Maybe you can just call her Nana and Tata for lolo.
My friends, who are all your immediate aunts, like your Tita Mimi, Ninang Alona, Tita Mads, Tita Arbheen, Tita Kelly and others.
There are so many people who care for us that I can't even enumerate all of them. We are so lucky indeed,baby!
I hope that you will be a happy and healthy person.
That is what Mommy wishes for you.
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